A few years ago I asked Mr. Hubby if our marriage was everything he thought it would be. He thought for a minute, laughed and replied “Well, I thought we’d have more sex.” I laughed back and said “Well, I thought we’d have more money.” We both gave each other a courtesy laugh, turned out the light and went to bed. But I couldn’t get his comment out of my of my head. When we were in our 30’s, my libido was great. Now? Well, it was almost like the planets had to align.
So I set up to find out what I could do to bring back the magic of desire—a way to nudge my sex drive into first gear again. The answer I found was in a little hormone called testosterone.
When I was in my mid to late forties, I went to see a MD/internist who specializes in bio- identical hormone therapy. Actually, I made an appointment to talk to her about my libido and my PMS. I wasn’t in menopause yet. She ran my blood work and came back with this result. My testosterone and progesterone were low.
If you think testosterone is only for men. You are wrong.
So I let her place a small testosterone pellet, surgically under the skin near my hip. There it would slowly be absorbed and last about 4 – 6 months. Why not the testosterone creams? They don’t always work and the cream often gets washed or sweats off. This pellet would give me a low constant dose. She said I would feel different in about a week. In addition, she would treat my PMS with natural progesterone that I would take orally at night. I bought this at a compounding pharmacy.
I waited for two weeks and slowly I began to feel differently. Kind of funny really, I was taking a second glances at my hubby as he got out of the shower. And I was looking forward to our date nights again. Could this be the testosterone? Somehow it made me almost feel sexy again. I know, crazy.
I won’t give you the personal specifics but I’ll say this… Yes, it did work. In fact, when it starts to wear off, I find Mr. Hubby looking around for my doctor’s phone number to remind me to make an appointment. I won’t say it’s a cure all though. It takes a loving partnership to have a good sexual relationship.
Funny thing though… my doctor tells me that 30% of her patients are now men. Guess why? Its those men that can’t keep up with their wives soaring libido! Gotta love it.
Note: No form of testosterone is FDA-approved for women in the US so doctors often have testosterone patches, gels or cream prepared at compounding pharmacies. A new study in the journal Menopause, recently identified the effective testosterone dose for women. Researchers in Australia tested both 5 mg and 10 mg doses of a standardized 1% testosterone cream in seven healthy post menopausal women with low testosterone blood levels. They found that applying the 5 mg does to the upper arm daily for six weeks brought testosterone levels back to normal, while the 10 mg dose elevated levels too high.
Allison Cioth says
I have many friends in their late 40’s and have noticed many comments in the last couple of years about how some of them have lost interest in sex, so I suspect there are many women out there who just accept this loss of libido without questioning whether there is something they can do about it. This is a great post to bring awareness to women to be proactive about their sexual health.
Heidi Diller says
Thanks Allison- There is no sense in just saying its part of getting older.Its an important part of keeping the marriage alive!